At some point or another in our life we’ve all experienced the weight of striving to be perfect.We’ve all tried to impress someone, whether it was our parents, the other kids, work colleagues or potential love interests.Hands up: who has spent most of their life trying to either live up to expectations or trying to fit in?Me!You!Wow, there’s a few hands raised here!I never wanted to be like the others, but being me wasn’t exactly easy.Especially growing up!Most people thought I was just a very odd kid, with all this talking about spirits, energy and stuff that made me look like Harry Potter’s great auntie!My parents even took me to a priest cause they thought I was really weird and they just could not understand why I kept on saying I saw spirits in the house.That was tough!Later on in life I really tried to tone my eccentric ways down and went out of my way to fit the mold.But I’d always end up being “the different one”.And I must have felt really bad about it, cause suddenly I just thought “nah, screw this! I’m out of here”.And I took off this very tight jacket I had been wearing for so long and started to live a “real life”.A life where I let myself get it wrong.And wrong again.To my surprise each mistake gave me a bit of myself back.Every “boo boo” time allowed me to re-become ME.

We Are All Scratched

The best thing someone ever said to me, apart from my husband announcing I was to become his wife, was actually after our wedding.In a “failed right from the start” attempt to be the perfect newly bride, I saw with terror how my wedding ring had a scratch!I was horrified.I was so distressed that I actually had a meltdown.”It’s a sign” – I cried out – “It’s a sign that this marriage is not to be”.Luckily a very wise friend came to my rescue and very sternly said “Darling, we are all scratched!” (and also get a life!)Yes, we are!
We all carry scratches that have become scars from living a life that is often too small for us.When we force ourselves to be small, we live a lie.But our soul doesn’t lie.Our soul will carry many lifetimes’ scars but will also wither away when we try and be who we are not.It can only thrive when we show up just as we are.Yet, it’s always easier said than done.

Be Authentically Flawed

We worry that if we got just one more scar, the pain would actually crush us.So we play safe, do what everybody else is doing, think what everybody else thinks they are thinking.Then one day we wake up and most of our life has gone and we realized that we never lived after all.The death of the soul is never caused by what the World won’t give us or acknowledge.Whenever we walk away from ourselves our soul dies a little.Many times we will abandon ourselves and many deaths we will endure.Some people are just dead their whole life.They remain trapped by a world that is built on noise when they come from silence.They are forever prisoners within the thin web all their fears slowly weaved around their hearts.What if, for one day only, you showed up as your imperfect self?What if you could afford being authentically alive in all your flaws rather than soulfully dead in your strident perfection?Today wear your scars with pride.Show them to the world and be “authentically flawed“.

Antonia Lyons

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