My friend has just announced she is taking a sabbatical year to go to Asia and learn all about the art of being happy.
She stares at me, possibly expecting words of praise and admiration.
I look back at her, wondering why so many folks leave London only to venture down a road so often travelled.
I can’t help thinking that one day she’ll be back, and her newly found happiness would be tested at every turn.
Never the less, I wish her good luck and tell her to treasure her heart.
It always amazes me when people set out on long journeys to “find” themselves.
We are so enamoured with the idea of conquering the unknown of a foreign land that we often miss out on the gift every single moment offers in its impermanence.
The following morning, as I make my way into work, I notice how many people on my train have their noses stuck in their tablets or smart-phones.
Despite the early hour, they are completely lost in games and Tv series.
We avoid silence because it scares the hell out of us.
We constantly search for distractions because being quiet may land us in a place we’d rather never be. A void that may swallow us in.
So off we go to far away countries believing that our happier self is somewhere out there waiting for us.
Later on we’ll entertain friends with details of our adventures. We will tell them how we touched real poverty with our hands (Why? Is there a fake poverty, I wonder?). How we were blown away by people’s love and generosity and how we watched the sunset in awe and gratitude.
What happened to the love and generosity we received back home time again?
Do those who embark on spiritual sabbaticals ever realize that their lost self was always there next to them at the bus stop? Hidden behind the strangers’ smile, they walk past on the street?
I believe we like to complicate life as “hard” sounds better.
It gives us more credit.
It makes us sound brave because we challenged ourselves by going all the way to a remote land. We conveniently forget the times we politely ignore our neighbours in the lift just because it is never a good idea to get too close to others. We’d rather go all the way to the Himalayas rather than being in life here at home.
Next time you wonder if you should pack up and move abroad in search of happiness, look at how you choose to show up every moment right where you are.
Watch yourself surrounded by others only tot retreat in your little world. Too afraid to receive and even more so to give because you may end up feeling bare and vulnerable.
What would happen if you kept your heart open instead?
You would probably come to learn that your smile is the only ticket to that “self” you are looking for, and the more you offer it to the world, the further this journey will take you.
And so be it,
Antonia Lyons
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I’m the founder of Evoking Grace, a coaching program designed to inspire others to be their very best while bringing ease and balance into their everyday life. I can be contacted by email for more details on the work I offer or to schedule a free “Wisdom Within Session”. Follow my mumbling & musings on Facebook , Twitter & Pinterest to be part of my “online tribe”.
Hi Antonia, this is all so true. I think a lot of people are trying to run away from themselves and don’t even realise it and those that don’t run away consume al their time with games, apps, films, TV etc, never fully connecting to themselves.
Wow, a lot of insight here. Thank you for sharing! T x
Reblogged this on Jackie's World Travel.
Thank you Jacqueline for re blogging my post, I’m happy when my readers share the love! Bliss & Grace from my Heart to Yours
Very thoughtful and very true. I’ve always approached travel as not so much finding myself, but it certainly helps put your own day to day life in perspective. Getting a world view as it were. I do agree that empathising and communicating more with our neighbours and strangers would make our own worlds a brighter place.
Blessings Em! The lift is definitely one my favorite places: you could be standing right next to your neighbors without even attempting a word (well at least here in London) but then you’ll be dying to learn all about a new culture! Truly mesmerizing! Bliss & Grace from My heart to Yours x
I think there is a lot of truth in this. If you can’t find happiness close to home, then there is no magic bullet that will help you find it on the other side of the world!
Having said that, I have seen some people really flower when they are opening themselves up to a new culture and living abroad. I have a friend (that I met in Japan) who was so, so awkward and difficult to chat to when he first arrived. Over a few years living in the Japanese countryside he REALLY started to be happy, make friends and really started to live well. In the end he got married and has a really cute child. I met a few people like this who just really suited moving away from their own culture. It can work for some people. 🙂
Blessings Josy all the way from London! This is a very interesting subject as people can really feel so differently! I have a friend here In London who really would love to move to India and doesn’t mind at all how different people approach life out there! Yet, if you dared standing too close to her over here and being her space, she’d freak out! Truly mesmerizing how human mind works! Bliss & Grace from My heart to Yours x
I couldn’t agree more. I am from India and does that mean all people here are happy and have found themselves? Of course NO. Happiness is a state of mind. If you can’t achieve it where you are, how would you in an unknown land? This is how I would see to it. Beautiful post.
Blessings Parul all the way from London and thank you! I wrote this post to start my journal because I wanted it to be my coaching’s core message. I chose to live here in London and I know for fact that the grace & ease we all look for are right here, where you are. Wherever you are in fact!
Bliss & Grace from My heart to Yours x
I loved this post!
Thanks so much Ritu! It was my very first one and it kind of set off the mood of my work as a coach! Grace to you my lovely x